Four years ago.
You cried and we were surprised.
They took you away after a quick kiss from me.
They wheeled me back to my room.
I knew where they took you.
They were trying to help you breathe.
I knew I'd see you soon.
You were a few hours old my sweetheart,
I finally saw you
nurses hovering,
lights, tubes, beeps
seemingly endless.
You shouldn't have to be here.
"Let's go home, my dear," I whisper
in your sweet ear.
"Get well, I know you will, then we can go home.
Home."
You looked so strange.
So sick.
and milk.
I touched your soft head
and wished
so many things.
Things so unattainable.
And yet I tried to be grateful,
to our God,
our God of mercy and love.
The God who holds you now.
Happy Birth Day my sweet sweet Emily.
Happy Existance day, I'm so glad you were born,
I'm so glad I got to see your face,
I'm so glad I got to hold you, twice, and feel your warmth.
I'm so glad I got to kiss you,
touch you,
and smell you.
You are in the best place a parent could ever desire,
and I love you.
Happy Birthday Sweetness.
ReplyDeletehappy birthday emily, you are well loved.
ReplyDeleteThrough my tears I am smiling. What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful child.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your birthday wishes Em, Kristin and Anon. We tied up some balloons above Emily's Juneberry tree planted in our garden. We had strawberry shortcake with candles. It was a hard day, of course, but I'm glad we celebrated the day like a regular birthday. It was very healing. ~Renee
ReplyDelete