of Echoes Past

Love and Death.

What time the mighty moon was gathering light

Love paced the thymy plots of Paradise,

And all about him roll'd his lustrous eyes;

When, turning round a cassia, full in view,

Death, walking all alone beneath a yew,

And talking to himself, first met his sight:

"You must begone," said Death, "these walks are mine."

Love wept and spread his sheeny vans for flight;

Yet ere he parted said, "This hour is thine:

Thou art the shadow of life, and as the tree

Stands in the sun and shadows all beneath,

So in the light of great eternity

Life eminent creates the shade of death;

The shadow passeth when the tree shall fall,

But I shall reign for ever over all."

~Alfred Lord Tennyson

My daughter's birthday is a mixture of joy and sadness, gratefulness and longing, life and death. And though the above poem may not be completely theologically correct, it puts it in such a beautiful light. Though Emily passed through the shadow of death, Death will not reign eternal. Though she fought for life and we fought with her and for her, Death still won. But his win is totally temporary. In view of eternity, life wins out. Love champions. Emily's death is but a shadow, a blink of an eye, a breath. As is my life here on earth- a mist, and then I too will be gone. And then, together with Christ, Emily and I will dance in the light, where there is no more shadow.

14th May 2015

Dearest sweetest Emily,

     Your birthday is coming up. You will be seven years old. Seven! You are growing up so fast. I wonder what you look like now. What color is your hair? Are your eyes hazel like your siblings? What do you like to do in heaven? Are you an artist or an engineer? Do you enjoy music, do you sing to Jesus with your sweet voice? I'm sure you have a lovely voice. 

    Or maybe time is different in heaven. Maybe you are still an infant, a mere nine days old, and you are waiting for Joel and I so we can be with you as you grow up. 

    We all miss you Emily. We wish we could all be together as a family. Even now, at supper time, I think "someone is missing, there should be one more plate." And your siblings save a space for you in the van. In the back, in the middle. 

    That's where you would be. With us. Together. 

    We love you so much Emily Grace, full of light and hope fulfilled. Save a space for us in heaven, we'll be there when our Lord calls us home.

Love, your mommy

"April Update" or "Renée writes another newsletter one beautiful Easter afternoon"

Hello there! I (Renée) am sitting here enjoying a peaceful Easter Sunday afternoon. I hope that your Easter holiday is filled with reflection on what Christ has done for us, both on the cross and beyond the tomb. 

This morning was definitely a highlight of the weekend for me. Easter Sunday is the happy day after the solemnity of Good Friday and the reflection of grief on Silent Saturday. I look forward to the Resurrection Day when we can reflect on the joy of the disciples and of the Marys. So this morning we initiated a little sunrise service here at the base. The sun rises quite early but our kids were good sports and were excited to watch the sunrise, so at 6:30 we were rumbling along on the trailer behind the tractor out to the field where we could watch the beautiful sun. The morning was beautiful, mostly clear and quite cool (33F). I could hear the call of the ruffed grouse followed with the beat of his wings. (Which I remember the first time I ever heard that sound I thought I was being attacked by wild horses!!) The geese and the ducks saying their good mornings and I loved the fact that there were no bugs!

Four YWAM staff joined our little family to welcome in the Resurrection Sunday! Hallelujah!

Coffee, cinnamon buns, hymns and the refreshing early morning light: His mercies are new every morning!
Happy Easter!

So let me back up a bit. I'm assuming you have read our February Newsletter and are familiar with our English Cross Cultural Orientation (ECCO) School. Well, these beautiful souls have graduated and most of them have left. They will be missed by all of us.

It was a joy to work with them, though I (Renée) had minimal involvement in the school (only two hours a week helping Joel teach the Bible class) but I got to know a few of them, and it was easy to see Christ shine through them as they worked, studied, and played each day as the school progressed. Graduation night (Thursday April 2) was a night to remember. All of them were dressed to the 9's and they all looked so proud of themselves! And they have reason to be! They all worked so hard and have come so far in their English skills and also their faith in God. The glow around each of them was contagious. 

ECCO 2015! Give them a round of applause!

Joel and the other YWAM staff worked more closely with the students. Here I have a few pictures to share from the last few months:

Joel teaching some students how to make homemade pizza.

Joel leads worship regularly at the base here. It was a joy to see him involving the students each week.

One of our weekly local outreaches: Hudson (right) assists in Bingo at an elderly care center with a student from Columbia.

Working on pronunciation was a big thing for our ECCO students. This specific picture is showing J. D. giving his testimony of how God has worked in his life over the last three months. All the students had this assignment: These testimonies were  powerful, encouraging and worth all the hard work our staff put into these students' lives!

ECCO 2015 was a blast to be a part of. I thoroughly enjoyed each week and am already excited about next year!

* * *

 In our personal lives: 

The kids are doing great. Joshua (10) and Rachel (8) are doing well in public school. They are making friends, which has been an answer to prayer. We have had a few of these fun friends over to our house and I enjoy getting to know them.

Madelynn (5) and Hudson (4) are still enjoying homeschool. Their favorite activity is the science experiment for each week.

First some fun pictures and then following that I will update you on some important news:

Early Spring: My fun puddle flowers!

Sisters

Joshua turned 10 in March!

No this isn't Grampa, it's Joel out for an early morning hike.

Hudson surrendering to nap time.

Aren't those pictures fun? That was the second time Hudson has fallen asleep under the laundry basket. The first time I wasn't sure where he was because he was completely enclosed curled up like a little bug.

Ok, onto News-ey stuff:
In our last newsletter we mentioned a possibility of going to a large Asian country this summer as a family missions trip. This opportunity has closed due to the danger of radical religious groups in that country, both to us and to the mission there. So we thank God for His direction and continue to wait patiently for whatever God has for us next. Meanwhile we will bloom where we are planted and embrace YWAM Minneapolis with all that we have and are.

  Our second bit of News-ey stuff involves myself. Our God has strongly directed me to apply and be involved in the upcoming School of Ministry Development (SOMD). This school begins Sunday April 12 and will be for three months ending in June. Please click on the link and read about this school on YWAM Minneapolis' website. I will be learning much about ministry and what it means to start one, be involved in one, the finance part of it, world religions and world views, how to evangelize, and etc. This will provide education and time for me as Joel and I seek God together as to where He wants us and to be better ministers of the faith. Whether here at YWAM Mpls or ministering overseas.
  Joel will be part time staff- working 10 hours a week heading up the worship department, and the rest of his time will be fulfilling his role as stay-at-home Dad, which also involves homeschooling M and H.

Thank you for reading and for your prayers and support!

With much love, Joel and Renée (and Joshua, Rachel, Madelynn and Hudson)

I will close with a poem that seems fitting in our season of Easter celebration, which to me is also like a gateway into Spring, the season of Hope.

Song

The winds, as at their hour of birth,

Leaning upon the ridged sea,

Breathed low around the rolling earth

With mellow preludes, "We are free."

The streams through many a lilied row

Down-carolling to the crisped sea,

Low-tinkled with a bell-like flow

Atween the blossoms, "We are free."

-Tennyson, Lord Alfred

February Newsletter!

https://www.dropbox.com/s/qtaesje3g3e5osh/February%20Newsletter.pdf?dl=0

A long totally uninteresting post about the past year in YWAM

   As I look over the last year of our being in YWAM, I am amazed that we are still here. Does that surprise you? The last year was an incredible adjustment for me, for Joel, for the kids. The previous nine years was spent in a small town in a big county. Next to a beautiful, humongous puddle.

Joel with 9 mo old Rachel Summer 2007

This community was really the first for Joel and I in our marriage adventure. Sure we moved about every 1, 2 or 3 years to a different house, but it was always in the same community, same sweet town, same church family, same friends. Same wonderful grocery stores, bank and Post office.

So when God swung open the wide door of MISSIONARY and YWAM and FIVE HOURS AWAY FROM EVERYTHING FAMILIAR the adjustment was not a shock, but more like an ache. A dull, panging ache. Don't get me wrong, I love it here...now. The people are great- I love the staff. I love the students. We live out in the country. The kids are making friends. But as I look back on the last year, it's been hard. Lonely, in fact. Wondering "why" God put us here. What is our role here?

It's amazing what answers come in just a year. I don't ask God "why am I here?" quite so often as I used to. I see this time here at YWAM as a time of training. Of preparation for Something Else down the road. God is training us to be leaders. But as every leader should know- it's about servant hood. Joel is serving in the maintenance department. I am serving our children. Both of us help out where needed at the YWAM base, whether it's in the kitchen, in the accounting office or just cleaning.

God is teaching me to be content as a mother. At home. Cleaning. Cooking. Homeschooling. Raising children. This has been a hard lesson for me over the last year. I want to be over at the base Doing something. Anything. Because then, I'm doing something Important. Yes, this has been a hard lesson to learn.

Over the last year, I have experienced some emotional healing through a ministry called Theophostic Prayer Ministry (TPM). I have experienced freedom from different lies I believed about myself and God has brought His Truth into my life to set me free from those lies- permanently. This has been wonderful for me and I know it's another reason why I am here.

There are many other reasons why God has put us here, but those are the two I'm going to share with you tonight.

On a lighter note: I was praying and struggling about learning Spanish. Since ninth grade I have tried to learn this language off and on. But to no avail. I would try and try to learn it and then I would keep hitting a wall, and then I would quit trying. Then six months later I would pick it up again, only to fail again. So finally I asked God, "why? Why is it so hard for me to learn this language?" And do you know what He said to me? You'll never guess. When He told me His answer I didn't believe it. Until He told me again two days later: "I want you to learn German." ??? Why in the world would I want to learn German? Nothing against German, except that it sounds harsh, like Russian. I guess in one way I was relieved He didn't ask me to learn French. Whew.
So there you have it. For 2.5 weeks, I have been learning German, thanks to Duolingo. And you know? It's coming along a lot easier than Spanish ever did. Amazing.

I have a little praise report: Rachel had a severe stomach ache one night. She was doubled over and moaning in bed. I gave her peppermint. But that didn't seem to help like it usually does. I could only think of one thing- Appendix. No, not at the end of this long rambling post. I was thinking of a ruptured appendix. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about rushing off to the ER ten minutes away in the cold and snow and it was 11:30 pm and I would really like to go to sleep..please? I tried to give it over to Jesus. We prayed over Rachel. We tucked her in. Then we went to bed and waited. We prayed. And prayed. Rachel didn't get up. Not once during that night after 11:30. She woke up happy and ready to go to school. She was fine. I could hardly believe it. No surgery. She still had her appendix and I even got some sleep. God is good. Aren't you glad?

Having ECCO students and staff over for dinner and coffee

So a quick update on two things here at YWAM: One is that Joel and I are co-leading (yes) a Bible Class for our current school (English Cross Cultural Orientation aka: ECCO). We teach one hour twice a week. Monday and Thursday mornings. Hudson and Madelynn come with us and they do fabulous. I think it's because the students are so fun. Joel and I are writing and inventing the curriculum for this Bible Class and it has been such a blast. We sing songs, we play games, the students share (in English) what God is teaching them. This morning the students demonstrated their hard work and put on two performances: Original children's songs written, sung and performed (in English) by all the students in Noah's Ark theme. Oh they did such a great job!

ECCO Bible Class

And the second thing is that once a week in the afternoon we take four ECCO students and volunteer at the local thrift store. This has been fun getting to know these specific students a little better. Last week they came over for supper afterwards and we had a great time together.

At the Thrift Store

Joshua and Rachel are both in Scouts this year. This has been a good decision so far as it is helping them to form friendships and do something fun outside of school and YWAM. Joshua made his first Pinewood Derby car and Rachel will soon be selling Girl Scout cookies.

The L.S. Rock-It!

Two things you can be praying for us about:

1. We are still looking for a church. We were going to one since June 2014 but it has gotten very difficult with the timing (it's an evening service) and being a school night and all....The worship is great, the teaching is solid, the people are nice, and it's not a very big church. We've really enjoyed going there. But being on staff at YWAM, early mornings at public school, and trying to eat healthy have become large obstacles. So the hunt continues...

2. Please continue to pray for Joshua and the disease that haunts his body- Type 1 Diabetes. He is currently on a liver cleanse diet and it has been helping him. We continue to seek God and His Righteousness and we know that all things will be added to us as well-whether it's healing or just an improvement in blood sugar numbers.

3. (Ok there's actually three, not two) We are praying about taking a family missions trip this summer. Right now we are seeking God on a specific ministry that we have been made aware of in a large Asian country. We would like to travel there this summer and stay for a month and see how it goes. How we could fit in, how the kids do, how I do (with elephants, heat, snakes and oh yeah, spiders-really really big ones).


Going back to life at YWAM....
The kids are doing really well. This is home now. Though they talk about Grand Marais and want to go and visit. And oh yes, Madelynn wants to move back there, not just visit.

Rachel turns EIGHT on Saturday (can you believe it??), so our house will be pink for a few days.

Sledding Birthday Party!
Here's the train...watch out!
Love Rachel's face in this one.
(She's the one with a light green jacket, her mouth wide open-yelling of course.)

Joshua is doing a unit on Engineering in Science class so he's been constructing roller coasters and really enjoying himself.

Hudson is four now and is just as cute as ever. He's the baby of the family, so he probably gets cuddled way too much by Rachel and I. But he's becoming a handsome little man and knows how to count to 13 (skipping the 12) and recognizes the letters of the alphabet.

Hudson's Fourth!

Homeschooling Madelynn is easy peasy and I'm really enjoying this break from the usual chaos at home.

And that's about it! That wasn't too bad was it? At least there weren't any footnotes or a dozen appendices like the Lord of the Rings books. Hope you enjoy the rest of your day in the Presence of the One who is worth Everything.

At Minnehaha Falls visiting a friend in Minneapolis

A Hymn To Contentment

Lovely, lasting peace of mind!

Sweet delight of human kind!

Heavenly born and bred on high,

To crown the favourites of the sky

With more of happiness below,

Than victors in a triumph know!

Whither, O whither art thou fled,

To lay thy meek, contented head;

What happy region dost thou please

To make the seat of calms and ease!

Ambition searches all its sphere

Of pomp and state, to meet thee there.

Encreasing Avarice would find

Thy presence in its gold enshrin'd.

The bold adventurer ploughs his way

Through rocks amidst the foaming sea,

To gain thy love; and then perceives

Thou wert not in the rocks and waves.

The silent heart, which grief assails,

Treads soft and lonesome o'er the vales,

Sees daisies open, rivers run,

And seeks, as I have vainly done,

Amusing thought; but learns to know

That solitude's the nurse of woe.

No real happiness is found

In trailing purple o'er the ground;

Or in a soul exalted high,

To range the circuit of the sky,

Converse with stars above, and know

All nature in its forms below;

The rest it seeks, in seeking dies,

And doubts at last, for knowledge, rise.

Lovely, lasting peace, appear!

This world itself, if thou art here,

Is once again with Eden blest,

And man contains it in his breast.

'Twas thus, as under shade I stood,

I sung my wishes to the wood,

And lost in thought, no more perceiv'd

The branches whisper as they wav'd:

It seem'd, as all the quiet place

Confess'd the presence of the Grace.

When thus she spoke-"Go rule thy will,

Bid thy wild passions all be still,

Know God-and bring thy heart to know

The joys which from religion flow:

Then every Grace shall prove its guest,

And I'll be there to crown the rest."

Oh! by yonder mossy seat,

In my hours of sweet retreat,

Might I thus my soul employ,

With sense of gratitude and joy!

Rais'd as ancient prophets were,

In heavenly vision, praise, and prayer;

Pleasing all men, hurting none,

Pleas'd and bless'd with God alone:

Then while the gardens take my sight,

With all the colours of delight;

While silver waters glide along,

To please my ear, and court my song;

I'll lift my voice, and tune my string,

And thee, great source of nature, sing.

The sun that walks his airy way,

To light the world, and give the day;

The moon that shines with borrow'd light;

The stars that gild the gloomy night;

The seas that roll unnumber'd waves;

The wood that spreads its shady leaves;

The field whose ears conceal the grain,

The yellow treasure of the plain;

All of these, and all I see,

Should be sung, and sung by me:

They speak their maker as they can,

But want and ask the tongue of man.

Go search among your idle dreams,

Your busy or your vain extremes;

And find a life of equal bliss,

Or own the next begun in this.

-Thomas Parnell (1679-1718)