Funny Say-ings Vol. 2

Kids are hilarious, aren't they? I enjoyed recording what the kids said in a previous post and it seemed others enjoyed it too. So I've continued jotting them down and thus we have another volume of silliness which begins around Christmas 2011 and goes through mid-summer 2012:




Rachel tries the egg nog. 

Mommy: "Do you like it Rachel?"

Rachel: "No, I don't like it."

Mommy: "That's ok, you don't have to like it."

Rachel: "If I don't like it, does that mean the police won't come get me?"

***


Rachel: "Crunch Sewed Christmas" 


(Do you get it? Think Dr. Seuss)


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Mommy: "Madelynn, how's your diaper? Do you need a diaper change?"

Madelynn: "Hmm, prob'ly I do."

***


The phone rings.
Rachel: "I'll get it! I'll get it! I'm coming, phone!"
Rachel answers the phone: "Hello! Here I am!"


***


Madelynn to Daddy: "Daddy, God made you a beard."
Joshua: "God has a whole box of beards."


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Madelynn: "Daddy, I have a secret to tell you."
Daddy: "You do? What is it?"
Madelynn (smiling her biggest grin): "It's a big smile."


***

I asked Rachel where something was and she replied: "It's in the ghetto." 

I think she meant 'garden'.

***

One summer morning, Joshua, Rachel and Madelynn donned on their super hero capes fastened with clothespins. As they were making their way outside, Rachel announced to me of their superhero plans: "We are going to save people from the ocean!"

I reply: "The ocean, wow!"

Rachel (demonstrating with her hands): "Yes, when we see someone in trouble we are going to swoop down and lift them out!"

Later that day:

The kids inform me that they will not be leaving this area until everyone knows Jesus. They have set up house in the woodshed and are being persecuted for their faith- don't worry mom, the invisible accusers only have pop guns.

Later that day:

Joshua, Rachel, and Madelynn have assorted duffel bags out for playing. As I finish up the dishes after dinner, they pretend to be ants and inchworms by being completely enclosed in the bag and "inching" along the floor. A mental visual is necessary as there is no photograph, but is quite hilarious (at least to us).

Later:

Rachel comes into the kitchen looking for a clothespin. She has a small blanket around her shoulders and as she is digging through the drawer, she asks me: 

"Mom, guess what I'm going to be."

Me: "Um, a superhero."

Rachel (still digging): "Nope! Guess again."

Me: "An inchworm."

Rachel (fastening clothespin): "Nope! Guess again."

Me: "A butterfly."

Rachel (walking out of the kitchen): "Yahoo, you're right."

***

Joshua reading a Bible verse: "In everything He might have the Super Mercy."

(see Colossians 1:18)

***

In a time of peace and quiet, out of nowhere: Rachel to Mom: "It must be hard to be a mommy. I want to be a mommy. But I won't be able to listen to Jesus. It's just too noisy!"


***


Madelynn (with utmost seriousness): "When I get Diabetes, I will become a boy."


***


Scene: Madelynn and Rachel playing in their bedroom. Rachel yells and Madelynn starts crying. Joel goes to see what's wrong. Madelynn explains: "Rachel won't let me kick her butt!"


***


Madelynn: "I twained myself to pwotty twain!"


***


Madelynn, referring to her hard boiled egg for lunch: "Mommy, please pop my egg for me?"


***


Joshua starts howling. Mommy goes into the living room to scope out the situation with as much calmness that can be mustered. Joshua seems to be holding his ear and crying and yelling in a loud sort of way. Something about a zipper and an ear? 
Comfort is needed before an explanation. No blood, thank goodness. After a few seconds the mystery is solved. Joshua was playing in a (very) large duffel bag. He had the desire to climb inside and zip up the bag, but failed to remove his ear in the path of the zipper.


***


Rachel: Mommy, spill my water.
Mommy: What? Spill your water?
Rachel: Yes, Spill my water.
Mommy: Where?
Rachel: My Cup. Please spill water into my cup.


***


To Be Continued!...